Random Thoughts: Year Ender, Part I

After a lengthy, unexplainable absence, I'm back! Complete with Random Thoughts, too, in case you were sick without them. If so, please see a doctor. There are side effects, but I'd rather not get into them here. That said, let's get into Random Thoughts:

—The marketing of my pet project with British up-and-comer Christopher Nolan, The Dark Knight Rises, has finally moved into second gear with poster number dos:

Let's take a moment to discuss the badassery of this, shall we? First of all, it's badass. Incredibly so. The shattered cowl goes right along with the comic book tale of Bane, the Bat-Breaker. It also reemphasizes this will be the final piece of Nolan's Bat-trilogy (as if the teaser trailer wasn't enough). But it offers something beyond the teaser's text ("Every Legend Has an End," "The Epic Conclusion..."): that shattered cowl. Is this Batman's end, too?

—I'm not sure how long the smartphone has existed, but I'll finally have one this Christmas: the iPhone 4S. What am I most looking forward to, you (didn't) ask? Siri. And hopefully the ability to rename her Jarvis and get her to speak with a male English accent. Also, the ability to grow a goatee and be a billionaire playboy with an ass-kicking iron suit. That'd be the ideal iPhone package.

—No Shave November has transitioned into Don't Stop December. I'm at nearly two months with my beard; I started with a completely shaved face back in October. I'm pretty much OK with it. My only problem? When I wear my hair down, everyone calls me Jesus. Instead of explaining that if Jesus existed, he'd have been brown all around, I'm going to start replying, "Yes, my child?" and ask for your love, devotion, and souls.

—Speaking of Jesus Christo, did you guys see Rick Perry's "Strong" ad? I'm not going to link to it here, but here's the transcript of the 30-second commercial:

I’m not ashamed to admit that I’m a Christian, but you don’t need to be in the pew every Sunday to know there’s something wrong in this country when gays can serve openly in the military but our kids can’t openly celebrate Christmas or pray in school.As president, I’ll end Obama’s war on religion. And I’ll fight against liberal attacks on our religious heritage. Faith made America strong. It can make her strong again.

Do I need to point out the ridiculous bigotry on display here, the absurd, revisionist view that America was founded as a Christian nation when it clearly was not, or can we all just sit back and laugh at the insanity that is Rick Perry? I almost feel bad for the Republican party. They have no one likable enough, smart enough, or charismatic enough to come close to beating President Obama (I'm not counting Ron Paul among them since he's a Libertarian in Republican clothing).

—Appropriately enough, here's Jesus' response to Rick Perry:

Jesus Responds to Rick Perry's "Strong" Ad from DC Pierson      

Should any of Jesus' claims about Rick Perry frighten or disturb you, I encourage you to research Rick Perry and the execution of not just the mentally handicapped, but also of the potentially innocent. You won't have to search too hard.

—You all didn't think I was done writing about The Dark Knight Rises, did you? Of course I wasn't! Because last week, Christopher Nolan and wife/producer Emma Thomas (both of whom I could've reached out and touched on set) showed the 6/7 minute prologue to the film to select filmmakers and film critics (there will also be a free early showing Tuesday night in select IMAX theaters). The response is, as expected, incredibly positive, with one consistent criticism: Bane's voice. Turns out, he's hard to understand (I think this is a theme for the Nolan Batman movies). Hopefully Mr. Nolan hears this criticism (unless it's a point to make Bane hard to hear) and fixes this before release in July. Or before the trailer (hopefully later this month).

—The lady and I just finished watching season 1 of Game of Thrones, or as we've called it, Incest of Thrones, Game of Incest, Incest Thrones, and Awesome. Now, I tend to be the nerdy, geeky one in the relationship, so I wasn't expecting her to really get into it too much. That said, I'd like to share my favorite of the texts I received from her while I was at work and she was watching it: "OMG if you watch 8 you can go to bed, but if you watch 9 you HAVE to watch 10!" Needless to say, if you haven't watched the show, get to it. We'll be reading the books soon, so one day, I'll tell you about them.

—My old home state is stupid and cruel. This is very clearly not a helpful situation. What does killing these breeds accomplish? Nothing. Because the people who train those types of dogs to be vicious and mean will be able to do that with any dog. And what happens when a more cuddly dog starts to pick up that reputation? The problem is not the dogs, it's the people raising and training them. It's sickening.

—But to end on a positive note, and give a big middle finger to Cumberland County, a pit bull saved a woman and her toddler from a potentially violent mugging. In case you're too lazy and/or scared to click the link, a mother and child were leaving a playground when a man with a knife approached her. This dog came out of no where and started growling and baring its teeth at this tool bag, who, like the superstitious and cowardly lot he is, ran off. The lady didn't know the dog, but it stayed with her until the cops came. If no one claims the dog, she plans on adopting it. Awesome.

—I have plenty more to say, and so I will, but in Part II. It'll definitely have more Batman. Maybe I'll have some of those Year End Lists people love. Maybe it'll be more topical, featuring the absurdity of President Obama and Congress passing the NDAA. Who knows?! Well, I do, but soon you will too!